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A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the r...   Life
A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relativ...   Life
After all, what is your host's purpose in having a party? Surely not f...   Life
Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the m...   Life
America wasn't founded so that we could all be better. America was fou...   Life
Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of soci...   Life
Automobiles are free of egotism, passion, prejudice and stupid ideas a...   Life
Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly...   Life
Children from the age of five to ten should watch more television. Tel...   Life
Children must be considered in a divorceŚconsidered valuable pawns in ...   Life
Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.   Life
Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting if enough angels...   Life
Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the ...   Life
Every government is a parliament of whores. The trouble is, in a democ...   Government
Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them...   Life
Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive patt...   Life
Feeling good about government is like looking on the bright side of an...   Life
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car ke...   Government
Gossip is what you say about the objects of flattery when they aren't ...   Life
Government proposes, bureaucracy disposes. And the bureaucracy must di...   Life
Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exc...   Life
I am a journalist and, under the modern journalist's code of Olympian ...   Life
I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a "learning experienc...   Life
I suppose I should get a VCR, but the only thing I like about televisi...   Life
If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.   Life
If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health,...   Life
If you say a modern celebrity is an adulterer, a pervert and a drug ad...   Life
In our brief national history we have shot four of our presidents, wor...   Life
Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on t...   Life
Making fun of born-again Christians is like hunting dairy cows with a ...   Life
Marijuana is self-punishing. It makes you acutely sensitive, and in th...   Life
Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife.   Life
Never fight an inanimate object.   Life
Never wear anything that panics the cat.   Life
No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If ...   Life
Politics are for foreigners with their endless wrongs and paltry right...   Life
Seriousness is stupidity sent to college.   Life
Social Security is a government program with a constituency made up of...   Life
Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more ...   Life
The Clinton administration launched an attack on people in Texas becau...   Life
The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter...   Politics
The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make ...   Life
The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. Thi...   Life
The weirder you're going to behave, the more normal you should look. I...   Life
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal...   Life
There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well ...   Life
There's one more terrifying fact about old people: I'm going to be one...   Life
What use is it to endure the Dutch Rubs and Indian Rope Burns that are...   Life
Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would pref...   Life
When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first thing...   Politics
With Epcot Center the Disney corporation has accomplished something I ...   Life
You can't get rid of poverty by giving people money.   Life