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Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a ba...  
Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone wh...  
For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone ...  
For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but ...  
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having hi...  
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was...  
I know you've been married to the same woman for 69 years. That is mar...  
I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing...  
If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd st...  
If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would...  
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover S...  
My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each...  
New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time...  
Talent alone won't make you a success. Neither will being in the right...  
The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about mo...  
We're more effective than birth control pills.  
When turkeys mate they think of swans.